who says a year can't change a person?

Cause it can. And it did.

Below is a tad bit of something from each month in 2009. If it's noted then it probably meant something, still means something or was impactful enough to include it. I hope I'm not missing anything, but if I am, well oh well.

I love my new-found freedom.



I went so many places in 2009 and seen so many things I normally would not have. Previously, I was consumed with trying to please everyone else and only after realizing that in order to make someone else happy you have to first be happy yourself did I take on this new persona and really start living.

My New Years was definitely a good way to start off the year. With my cherished resolution close to my heart, and a new beginning filled with a goal of good health and working out at my new gym with my new trainer, it was only fitting that I had a couple “encounters” from years past that ended up being a really funny coincidence and a reminder that I should never sell myself short. A reminder of the progression I’ve made in my life and the reason why those people are in my past and not my future. More than that it has been the experiences and the people I met in the months following that helped me continue with my year, the year of me.

February is a bit depressing and cold and usually a time to nestle on the couch sipping hot cocoa with whatever Netflix movie came that week, but I wasn’t settling for that. For me it was filled with hockey games, parties, wedding planning with Michaela and after-work socials galore. This was the month to socialize! I needed to meet more people and start regaining the part of me that had died in my relationship with Chris. Over the years, the fact that he didn’t enjoy going out and meeting people unless he was smashed made me stop enjoying going out at all and as a result I kind of lost my mojo. Something new always follows suite when you meet someone for the first time and that is what I take pleasure in. I had lost a good portion of this part of me and I was definitely going to try and regain it, and so that I did.

And so… the accessible side of me started to come out and shine after being stuck behind my thick skin for so long and I was back. The after-work socials continued for a bit, long enough for me to feel like I didn’t really need a controlled environment anymore and it was during this month when I felt comfortable with myself again, the kind of comfort where you can go and have dinner with yourself or take a walk without calling anyone to go with you. The really soft pajamas I thought I’d lost were just found lodged behind the dryer.

On a whim I went to Atlantic City in March. I could have asked questions or been concerned about the fact I was going to be the 6th wheel or that I didn’t really have the money to go or that I only had a week of notice, but I didn’t. The type of fun I had was immeasurable. I was me and everyone loved the fact that I was so funny and down to earth. I laughed a lot on this trip, sometimes at myself but most of the time at the crazy stuff we stirred up. Interpretive dancing was so much fun. I mean c’mon, how many variations of real-life things can you turn into a dance? I mean sure we all know the sprinkler and the lawnmower but the bartender and the wheelchair? Those deserve a laugh. So needless to say I had a fabulous time in Atlantic City and hung out with amazing people I never would have had I meddled in my mind too long. This was more fun than I’d had in a long time.


In April I dated a cop, then became friends with the cop, then never spoke to him again (although I did drunk dial once and heard his voice on the voicemail) – and well, then he felt bad and he took me out several months later but it ended in the same result, never speaking to him again. I also completed a multi-hour, several mile radius Scavenger Hunt of Winston-Salem, finishing 12th (or something like that) out of 70 or so teams. Attended the all-girls “In the bedroom party” where body shots were taken out of belly buttons and I started questioning the true relevance of men. And so naturally, I met a guy at the end of the month who gave me hope. Not only did his character enlighten me but his wisdom and his experiences provided me with the assurance I needed at that moment to continue growing as a person. His words through email up until the point I met him compelled me to know more about him, people, about life. His completely positive demeanor and everlasting smile still melts my mind. After meeting him, his words came to life. I realized at this point how fortunate I was to have met him. He has been in my head since the first day we talked, I think of him almost daily and only hope that I’ve made a tenth of the impact on him that he has on me. And although I do not know the degree to which, I picture him in my life a long time.

May was jumpstarted by a beautiful mountaintop wedding. In an effort to be thrifty I wearily decided to book a cheap motel instead of the crème de la crème where I thought everyone else was staying. Turns out I ended up hanging out with and taking care of the groomsmen and the groom the whole weekend ‘cause they all had the same idea. Truth be told, men don’t give two licks where they lay their head and I guess I’m not all that picky myself. May also marks my 2 year anniversary as a homeowner. So I thought it only feasible to refinance considering the market at this time. Smart move I hope, considering I knocked 10 years off my loan and 1.5% off my interest and about $15.00 off my payments - refinancing was another step in my life as an adult. Cheers! My dad also came to visit, I sure miss him a bunch. Seems like the time is too long in between when we see each other and too short when we finally get together. In any case it was great seeing him and spending time with him and hopefully I'll get to see him again this year. As far as love interest go, I went on 3 dates with a pilot (no dice), a couple dates with a stalker (no dice) and managed to hook up with a few oldies but goodies (a little ego booster to say the least). I also threw a bachelorette party for M and took a spur of the moment road trip to Wilmington. May oh may!

After hanging out with the girls for a few days, rehearsing, drinking, going to a strip club via party bus, drinking some more and running around like crazy people, M was married June 2 and it was a wonderful, beautiful wedding. June also was the month I hung out at Belews Creek on a boat ma’an. There is nothing like riding in a boat, in the open water, the feeling, the calmness.... well until you anchor the boat, get out to swim for a bit and realize the battery died - then there is a little bit of anxiousness, it was an adventure to say the least, that was the highlight. I also camped and tubed in the New River like I never had before - tying up tubes linking myself to a group of oh about 10 ther people and a few beer coolers and sitting back for 3 hours while you float down the river? WHAT? See the way I remember it was being hailed down a streaming river only to be turned over time and time again, loosing my flip flops, drinking more river water than I ever wanted to and at the end saying I never wanted to go tubing again. Well no shit, not when it can be the other way. What was I thinking?

Moonshinin'

About this time the heat was beginning to fester and summer was definitely here.
I've got the rest of the year covered too.... just gonna make you wait for it.
To be continued...