Five years ago I was a sad person.
I worried too much. I envied too much. I couldn't be happy with myself or my life.
I changed that.
I decided five years ago that I was going to do life a bit differently from now on.
I became happier.
I stopped to smell roses and any other flower I was curious about, because I could.
I became inspired.
I appreciated people more for being passionate and following their dreams.
I listened more. To people, stories, memories, music...to my heart.
I saw people people differently and I became more empathetic.
I learned. Every thing I did, I learned. Everything I didn't do, I learned.
Everything I wanted to do, I learned how.
I've become present.
Self-aware. Acknowledging. Loving.
Each year from that year forward I've looked back at how I've changed, how I've grown and where I've come. I've chosen not only to look to my future but to be thankful for all the changes I made to be a better person in year before.
Thanks 2014.
I have a purpose now.
Saturday, January 3, 2015
Friday, November 7, 2014
a lil bit of magic
So I took a lil hiatus... okay, a long one. My last post celebrated my decision to follow my dreams and pursue my MBA in Design Strategy. I left unaware and unknowing but high on hope and energy. Living and attending school in San Francisco was undoubtedly one of the bravest things I've ever done. The experience will forever remain one filled with amazing people, culture and learning's that I will never forget and no one can ever take away from me.
In our lives we often don't see things for what they are though, until we have some time to reflect. In the moment our perspectives are focused more intensely on what were doing and why were doing it, how it's going to affect us...etc. six months post-graduation, after having time to truly access and encapsulate two years of struggle, persistence, hard-work, in-depth research and iteration after iteration I now understand why I worked so hard in my twenties to create a strong foundation for myself.
I started working at 14 so I could buy my first car. I worked all throughout high school and my undergraduate career. I was often upset that my family couldn't afford to pay for everything, that I had to do stuff myself. Jealous of friends that had it easy and had things handed to them I worked even harder to make sure no one would see the difference between the two. I made sure I had everything I wanted. A good job, a career in my field, a house that I owned... savings. I worked my ass off. Not seeing then what I see now.
I thought many times that I was failing myself because I wasn't experiencing all that I should. I worked too much. I was being too predictable. I wasn't traveling enough. I wasn't being as careless and easy-going as the others. Not seeing that in my thirties I would need to fall back on all that I worked for in my twenties so I could pursue dreams that became clear to me in the most magical place I've ever lived.
I have my moments... many, many moments of wondering why I'm still jobless six months after securing a masters degree. Moments where I'm fearful I'll lose my house, my car, my path..all that I've worked for. I'm sad that once again I'm not able to travel as much as I'd like, do as much as I want or that things are a bit ambiguous once again. I know there is a reason and that reason keeps me strong, it keeps me sane and it keeps life worth living.
Life has it's ups and downs, there's no getting around it. For me, the best way I get through those down times is to see them as times to reflect and dissect. Times to get back to the root of my existence - my purpose. It's a time to see what I can and cannot do without. To remember those most exciting times to see where and when I was happiest... it's the time we hate while it's here but embrace it when it's gone and realize how much we really learned.
In our lives we often don't see things for what they are though, until we have some time to reflect. In the moment our perspectives are focused more intensely on what were doing and why were doing it, how it's going to affect us...etc. six months post-graduation, after having time to truly access and encapsulate two years of struggle, persistence, hard-work, in-depth research and iteration after iteration I now understand why I worked so hard in my twenties to create a strong foundation for myself.
I started working at 14 so I could buy my first car. I worked all throughout high school and my undergraduate career. I was often upset that my family couldn't afford to pay for everything, that I had to do stuff myself. Jealous of friends that had it easy and had things handed to them I worked even harder to make sure no one would see the difference between the two. I made sure I had everything I wanted. A good job, a career in my field, a house that I owned... savings. I worked my ass off. Not seeing then what I see now.
I thought many times that I was failing myself because I wasn't experiencing all that I should. I worked too much. I was being too predictable. I wasn't traveling enough. I wasn't being as careless and easy-going as the others. Not seeing that in my thirties I would need to fall back on all that I worked for in my twenties so I could pursue dreams that became clear to me in the most magical place I've ever lived.
I have my moments... many, many moments of wondering why I'm still jobless six months after securing a masters degree. Moments where I'm fearful I'll lose my house, my car, my path..all that I've worked for. I'm sad that once again I'm not able to travel as much as I'd like, do as much as I want or that things are a bit ambiguous once again. I know there is a reason and that reason keeps me strong, it keeps me sane and it keeps life worth living.
Life has it's ups and downs, there's no getting around it. For me, the best way I get through those down times is to see them as times to reflect and dissect. Times to get back to the root of my existence - my purpose. It's a time to see what I can and cannot do without. To remember those most exciting times to see where and when I was happiest... it's the time we hate while it's here but embrace it when it's gone and realize how much we really learned.
Saturday, September 15, 2012
Yeah that stuff.
When you arrive at the place in your life when things are never like you'd thought they'd be, ever imagined... your living.
Your living and your taking everything step by step, day by day.
My most recent decision to go back to school was one that I've been contemplating for awhile. I had no clear path in mind or even a program selected but that all changed one evening in January when I discovered CCA and the DMBA program. The pictures and thoughts of what it would be like journeyed through my head over the next several months and when I was accepted in the summer my head started to swirl a little more vividly.
Your idea of things never seem to be just that. I'm happy with the decisions I've made and know this is the right path for me but it's hard. Harder than I expected. Between the heavy workload, commuting back and forth from North Carolina to San Francisco, managing my time with group project, individual projects, homework, tweeting, reading, Google hangouts, packing, trying to find a job, trying to figure out where I'm going to live and trying to figure out what the heck I just did to myself.
The notion of putting school work before going out with friends or hanging out with my family, or taking my dog for a walk or even not sleeping for a few days because my list of "to-dos" is endless, wasn't in my idea.
And to top it all off, I am having a yard sale in a few short hours selling most all of the things that surrounded me in the past 10 plus years. And let me tell you, going through a lifetime of collections, memories and stuff is hard too. It's emotional, trivial and it just plain stinks. It's amazing the hold items can take in your life though, even if most of them don't matter. After emptying my storage unit and packing up the truck I rode back to the place I call home right now and couldn't help but question myself.
Why can't I keep it all? Why am I doing this? Why do I have to get rid of that? Why is this so hard? How come it's terrifying to think about your life without all this stuff?
While I don't have all the answers I know that the stuff I'm getting rid of won't be mad at me, it will find a new home and a new person to start leaching on to. It will become their thing, not mine. And will give me less to think about and less to clean.
I'm considering this a re-birth. A beginning, not and end. Here's to the traveler.
Your living and your taking everything step by step, day by day.
My most recent decision to go back to school was one that I've been contemplating for awhile. I had no clear path in mind or even a program selected but that all changed one evening in January when I discovered CCA and the DMBA program. The pictures and thoughts of what it would be like journeyed through my head over the next several months and when I was accepted in the summer my head started to swirl a little more vividly.
Your idea of things never seem to be just that. I'm happy with the decisions I've made and know this is the right path for me but it's hard. Harder than I expected. Between the heavy workload, commuting back and forth from North Carolina to San Francisco, managing my time with group project, individual projects, homework, tweeting, reading, Google hangouts, packing, trying to find a job, trying to figure out where I'm going to live and trying to figure out what the heck I just did to myself.
The notion of putting school work before going out with friends or hanging out with my family, or taking my dog for a walk or even not sleeping for a few days because my list of "to-dos" is endless, wasn't in my idea.
Why can't I keep it all? Why am I doing this? Why do I have to get rid of that? Why is this so hard? How come it's terrifying to think about your life without all this stuff?
While I don't have all the answers I know that the stuff I'm getting rid of won't be mad at me, it will find a new home and a new person to start leaching on to. It will become their thing, not mine. And will give me less to think about and less to clean.
I'm considering this a re-birth. A beginning, not and end. Here's to the traveler.
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Reflections
On a night where you don't ever want your cigarette to hit the filter, where you have a million thoughts running through your head, a million little chores, responsibilities, should, should nots... a million little dreams.
What I'm doing with my life.
Am I living up to the expectations of my parents, friends... myself? And most importantly, is what I'm doing going to leave this world a better place?
I've always wondered what I'm really supposed to do.
I mean I've always known
It's just up to me now. I'm doing it.
Friday, October 28, 2011
Website of the dizaaay
Geekologie.com
Stumbled upon it while searching for costume makeup.
Can't stop returning.
Why?
Well for starters... I'm going to spray paint our family turkey metallic this Thanksgiving.
http://www.geekologie.com/2011/10/no-longer-just-huffable-edible-spraypain.php
Then I'm going to take my dog Armani to get a new haircut.
http://www.geekologie.com/2011/10/zomboodle-zombie-shavedpainted-poodle.php
Afterwards I'll try to figure out which one of these fits best with my current situation.
http://www.geekologie.com/2011/09/real-mature-branded-condom-slogans.php
Then I'll sit around and dream about being a couture princess...
http://www.geekologie.com/2011/09/disney-princess-costumes-as-haute-coutur.php
They really have it all, most of which is pretty interesting.
Call me a geek if you will but this website get's my thumbs up and title of 'Website of the diz-ay'!
Stumbled upon it while searching for costume makeup.
Can't stop returning.
Why?
Well for starters... I'm going to spray paint our family turkey metallic this Thanksgiving.
http://www.geekologie.com/2011/10/no-longer-just-huffable-edible-spraypain.php
Then I'm going to take my dog Armani to get a new haircut.
http://www.geekologie.com/2011/10/zomboodle-zombie-shavedpainted-poodle.php
Afterwards I'll try to figure out which one of these fits best with my current situation.
http://www.geekologie.com/2011/09/real-mature-branded-condom-slogans.php
Then I'll sit around and dream about being a couture princess...
http://www.geekologie.com/2011/09/disney-princess-costumes-as-haute-coutur.php
They really have it all, most of which is pretty interesting.
Call me a geek if you will but this website get's my thumbs up and title of 'Website of the diz-ay'!
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Logo Design - Water Walkers, LLC
Water Walkers, LLC wanted their logo to be crisp, clean and impressive to mirror their image consulting company. Fresh Feathers added a short tagline which encompasses the Water Walkers mission and brings a better understanding of the company's everyday practices.
Logo Design Created by Fresh Feather Designs
Logo Design - Inspirational Flow
What's your flow? In this instance the client wanted a logo that would not only capture the 5 senses but also instill inspiration. The illustration is a combination of colors and symbols that evoke just that. Inspirational Flow is a one-day, black-tie event showcasing fashion, art and talent. This event will be held Spring 2011 at the exclusive Revolution Mills Studio in Greensboro, NC. To learn more visit www.InspirationalFlow.com .
Logo Design Created by Fresh Feather Designs
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